Love Lessons

It's a time of crisp mornings, the scent of daffodils, buds on dogwood trees … and hordes of college kids cramming into cheap motel rooms and gulping cups of alcohol in bathing suits with wild abandon. But spring break is not just a memorable event for the collegiate crew; it's also an experience that can provide dating lessons for years to come.
Harkening back to a time in your life when you were focused on fun and quoting "Carpe Diem" can actually help your state of mind as you search for love. So get ready to stop and smell the surf (and a little stale beer), and consider some dating lessons that the season's favorite break can teach us all.

Lesson #1: It's OK to date more than one person.
There was a time when a date was just a date. One night it was Mona; the next night, Claire, and things weren't considered serious until someone suggested going "steady." Now, we're in the era of the one-cocktail commitment, where dating more than one person is looked down upon. Except on spring break, that is, when you kiss two people in one night while texting a third to meet you at the Tiki bar. But the truth is, those college kids are onto something: If your dating goal is a lifetime relationship or marriage, then you'll have plenty of time for monogamous commitment. Maybe even decades of time.

So use your single days like the spring-breakers do — to get to know a few people at the same time, while you figure out which person you like best. As long as you're truly honest about your actions and intentions with everyone you date, you'll avoid the one break you don't want: the heart one.

Lesson #2: Don't drink more than your date.
Yes, alcohol can sometimes feel like a nice social lubricant. But before you dose yourself on your next date, take this spring-break lesson with you: It's all fun and games until you make a fool of yourself giving a stranger a lap dance on a public stage and then losing your cookies on someone's bare feet. If you and your date want to tie one on for kicks, go right ahead. Just be sure to do it together, perhaps even in private, lest you get so drunk, you end up in an embarrassing anecdote in a story about bad dates … which is exactly what happened to a guy who went on a date with my friend Jamie. "We went for Japanese food, and he suggested we order some sake," said Jamie. "I said I was good for a glass, but he wanted to get the whole large bottle. When I told him I wouldn't be able to drink that much, he said, 'That's OK, I will.' And he did." Jamie said his drunken behavior was less than attractive, and she couldn't wait to get home.

Lesson #3: Head to where there are more fish in the sea.
What's one reason all the young things on spring break always seem to find someone? Because there are just so many someones to go around! Give yourself a similar leg up. Instead of hitting the same old local bar full of the same old faces, try traveling a bit out of your comfort zone (and maybe your town), and hit spots where you might meet some new people.
It's basic math: The more people there are — tall, short, American, foreign, funny, round, skinny, intellectual, goofy — the more likely you'll be to meet a potential match. So this weekend, search for your fish in a few new places. Try a big karaoke bar, a darts tournament at a new pub, a demonstration at the Mac store. Or, of course, search online for love, which is just swimming with singles who want exactly the same thing you do: a great date.